Self- doubt is something that all of us at some point of time have struggled with. It can happen among therapists early in their career and anywhere in our work life. As counsellors we have all felt like we have achieved much but still feel like we don't really know anything. This is called the Impostor Syndrome, which can deal a hard blow to the self in the form of self-doubt. To beat self doubt at its own game is a process but not impossible. This can be done through positive strokes and positive affirmation which can help improve one's self esteem. Self- doubt can also be addressed in personal therapy.
Here are many healthy ways to deal with your self-doubt:
1. Self-Compassion:
Try not to be too hard on yourself, be kind and patient with yourself and as well as others. Practice being kind to yourself. This is will help to reduce self-doubt and improve your self-confidence.
2. Acknowledge Past Achievements:
What you accomplished in the past is truly an achievement for yourself. Reflecting on your past achievements can be very beneficial and productive. For example, things that you were reluctant to do but you tried it anyway and it turned out to be a great success. Remember these little victories and celebrate them, they can go a long way.
3. Compare Not Thyself:
Yes, even though it can be a little challenging, try not to compare yourself with others. Celebrate your talents and strengths, not matter how big or small. Everyone is different and unique and thus you must try not to compare your life with others.
4. Thinking Carefully:
Sometimes we are bombarded with negative thoughts and sometimes we end up believing them. When these thoughts occur, question them and see if they are really true. This is will help to reduce negative thoughts. Try to be positive in everything you do and notice if there is a change in your behaviour and productivity.
5. I am the Harshest Critic:
When we look at others it is easy for us to provide them with support and compassion. But sometimes we are very hard on ourselves, remember to provide that same love and support to yourself.
6. Build your support system ;
Try to be around people who support you and cherish you. Times when you might be feeling down or upset try to be around family and friends who love and support you, this will be a reminder of who you are and how cherished you are.
7. Self- Validation:
Recognize and appreciate your strengths and talents. It is helpful to be more receiving of what you can offer in any situation. Self- validation comes from within.
8. Journal Away:
Writing down one’s thoughts regarding self-doubt, is a healthy way of expressing oneself and it can reduce self- doubt. It helps you to recognize your own thoughts and have a better understanding.
9. Professional Guidance:
Consider professional support, by reaching out for therapy to help you deal with self- doubt. Therapy helps a person to deal with thoughts of self- doubt in a better and healthier way, with the tips, tools and other techniques.
10. Strong Values:
Pointing out what you are good at, and things that are important to you, can help you. For example, your values and beliefs that you follow, such as kindness and being caring can bring you focus and help you navigate through criticism.
In addition to the above measures, it is most important to know what your triggers are. The things that trigger you to feel self-doubt and other negative emotions are messengers from the unhealed parts of who you are.
A trigger is something that causes a person's emotional state to change; it can be an unpleasant experience. This in turn can affect the therapy and the therapeutic process. When a therapist is triggered during a session, the client may not be sure how to react. They feel that my therapist is not strong enough and therefore may refrain from sharing and opening up in further sessions. Being vulnerable is not a wrong thing but rather, it allows us to accept ourselves and create more meaningful experiences with others. Who we choose to be vulnerable with is what matters. Triggers often bring up a wave of emotions; it can cause a person to become emotional, angry, sad, nervous, scared etc. Triggers can be internal or external in nature. The best way to deal with triggers as a person is to address them during personal therapy. For example, it could be a certain idea, a situation, sights, sounds and smells that can be triggering. Identifying these triggers would help to deal with them more effectively. Other methods to handle triggers include mediation, exercising, and spending time with people who are positive etc.
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